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CAPTAIN: Have Ye been Attacked by a Ninja? Has a Ninja caused ye damages? Listen to me! I be Captain Hooke Silver, and I be an attorney that doesn't like Ninjas. We prosecute Assault and Battery, Elbow-Face, Defenestration, Automobile Accidents, Medical Malpractice, and Divorce Cases!

SMITTY: I got attacked by a ninja, and I was out of work for two weeks! But The Captain fought for my rights, and I got a lot of money!

CAPTAIN: So Call Me Now at 555-3827 and get ye The Booty Ye Deserve! YAAAAAAAARRRR!